Love, Marriage and name changes

My sister kept her maiden name when she married her husband.

I took my husbands name.

This is not what I had expected.  I had been very loud about planning to keep my name- as getting married did not change who I was- I was just married.

My husband wanted me to change my name- it was very important to him- when pressed he just said, "It was the way it was supposed to be."

I hesitated though.  I was embarrassed.  I didn't want to hurt my dad's feelings by dropping his name. Seriously- that was my biggest concern- I didn't want to hurt my dad's feelings.

Anyway-  I took his name.  Its my name now. Our name.

Slightly off topic but I was discussing this with another woman a few years ago and she thought you were required to change your name after marriage.  I was stunned, do you know anyone who thinks that?

Renaming littleDude

It has been brought to my attention that LittleDude would be better described with the nickname "scooter" in reference to how he crawled scooting his bum a long.

Now of course he can can walk but from now on--- he will be Scooter

LittleDude is braver than me...

There has to be a first injury right?

LittleDude sure got his.

My mom was visiting and we were outside, LittleDude was driving his toy car having a great time.  Until he wasn't, he climbed over short landscaping wall, I picked him up and pulled him out and set him down.  He turned around and toddled back towards the wall he tripped and fell, hitting his head on the stone landscaping wall right above his eye.

The awful hollow sound that his head made as it hit the stone sends a shiver down my spine whenever I think of it.

Immediately I picked him up- and saw the cut and my mind blanked I could not remember what I was supposed to do... Airway-- breathing--circulation right??

It was bleeding. a lot. I handed him to my mom to get ice and a towel.  There were no towels in the drawer. Of course. Found a towel. ice. pressure.

The cut was deep- edges were pulling apart.

We got in the car to go to the hospital and of course hit the longest.red.light.ever.

He vomited and got very drowsy so we detoured to the fire house where someone could actually probably think clearly.

The paramedics helped and took him to the hospital.   When we arrived at the hospital he was stitched and glued back together.

A popsicle was  the reward for being so brave for LittleDude.  I needed a glass of wine for holding it together.

He seems to not mind it in the least, but it looks awful!!! I hope it does not hurt him too much. 

Virtually Connected

When I was little--- you know a hundred years or so ago (my son asked me if we had electricity when I was born), computers did not connect to the internet- there wasn't an internet to connect to, your mail came to your house, you had a phone in the house that everyone shared, no cell phones, not texting, none of it. 
If I went somewhere, I'd leave a note on the counter, so would my parents, I also had an emergency quarter to call home with if I needed too- for a payphone. 

The phone most often used was in the kitchen and it had a long cord so you could walk all around the kitchen and still talk- but the phone itself was mounted on the wall. If someone called while the phone was in use- they got a busy signal (remember those?? I don't think my kids have ever heard one).

My mom would spend a lot of time talking to her friends on the phone chatting.  I don't.

The point of this is to discuss whether with all of out social media connections- we are more or less connected to others than before- because personally- I feel lonely- despite 600 facebook friends, 1000 twitter followers, and a house full of kids.

So with all of this connectedness how are we less close to others than we were 20 years ago?

Here are my thoughts:

My mom would chat for a while with just a few people- not 500.  But with those few people she was very open and had great support.

So while I chat on Facebook with a huge crowd- I am not open.  I am not giving of my deepest my real self- I lost touch with that long a go.

When talking on the phone or visiting in person, you can tell a lot about what a person is not saying by tone, inflection, or word choice.  How many huge fights have been started on the internet because of a comment that was said as a joke but the reader took it seriously (why we need a sarcasm font).

My mom actually saw the people she visited with.  They would sit and have tea together while the other kids and I played.

I am not saying that all tech is bad- I love video chatting with my kids when I can't be there- but it is just not the same as actually being there- iPads are great- but they kind of suck at hugs (said with sarcasm).

So, in some ways new technology brings us together- but in others it drives us apart- we can become isolated in our homes not venturing out to actually see people or have any real interactions..

All of the Facebook and text "I love you" messages in the world will not hold a candle to a great big hug from my husband and a kiss to tell me I am loved.

I am going to really make an effort to have real interactions with people in the coming months- not just virtual ones.

Hold me to it please.

Do you feel less connected or lonely despite the incredible technology out there??

time to turn it around

When I fell pregnant with my first, I was unmarried I waited until I was 6 months along- I had managed to hide the pregnancy through the holidays and gatherings.  First I told my sister- she said she would not advise me to get an abortion but she would always love me, I cried.  I went to her office to call my mother, I was too scared to do it alone.  She stood with me as I called my mom and broke the news. 

My parents were less than thrilled.  But they loved me.  They supported me.  Now 9 years later- having my first was the best thing that ever happened to me- she taught me how to love unconditionally.  She taught me forgiveness. She saved me.

her first picture......

And now...

Netflix Dropped Dora and Diego--- OMG

"My life is over!!" 

Pixie's favorite shows are Dora the Explorer and Go! Diego, Go!  She would watch them on the iPad via Netflix every day.  She learned so much about different animals and she loved seeing the live ones at the zoo and telling me about what she learned. 

One day- we were settling in for the night and she started looking for Dora or Diego on Netflix to watch an episode- they were gone.  With growing anxiety and fear I searched Netflix for the shows. They disappeared into thin air.

I don't think Map can help us with this problem.  After some investigating I found out that Netflix did not renew their contract with Dora and Diego's company.

Fab.

It was like her best friend left, and to a certain extent that is exactly what happened- Dora and Diego were her friends. 

The meltdown that followed could rival any tragedy.  There were tears, enough tears to fill an ocean... from both of us. There was sadness and mourning.

There was yelling:  "HOW DARE THEY TAKE MY SHOW AWAY!!!!"

Really-- were they not thinking about kids and how they love Dora and Diego? Were they not thinking of the parents?  What, exactly were they thinking about?

Pixie's heartbreak was palpable and real.

Thank goodness for Amazon Prime-- they still offer Diego and Dora for instant streaming.  And I will be buying a ton of Dora and Diego DVDs at resales so even if Amazon drops them we will still be prepared- just like Dora's Backpack and Diego's Rescue Pack.

Dishwasher Obsession

With my husband- we have always had a dishwasher and for some reason the kids have all been fascinated by it. 

Princess- who hated the vacuum loved the dishwasher. She could hear the door being opened from across the apartment she would get her little bum over there as fast as she could.

Stinky had the same fascination he would try and crawl into the dishwasher when the drawer was open. 
We plucked him off of the door more times than I can count.

Peas was the same way, add absurd determination and lightening fast crawling. I would usually pop her on my back and then do the dishes so she couldn't climb in, she would just pull my hair out by the roots. 

Pixie was the same way- and she loved to chase the vacuum.

Now it is LittleDudes turn.  The big kids help a lot, but he is so fast and he can pull hair like no one's business, when it is dishes time he usually goes in his bouncer-- baby jail- until the loading or unloading is done.  After we close the door he leans against the door and hugs it.  He loves the vibration and the warmth.

What is the huge draw to the dishwasher.  We may never know- a great mystery of baby kind.