Friday, February 7, 2014

I love my children more than I ever thought possible.

Right now I am at my wits end with Peas. 

She is so intense and that is a struggle for us.  As passionate as she is when she is happy, she is just as intense when she is angry or frustrated. I am having a hard time dealing with her frustration and anger.

Sometimes it seems like she cannot contain herself and lashes out at her siblings.  As much as sibling squabbles are a part of life, I don't know how to work with her when she gets stuck in that loop.  I have to just wait for the loop to wear itself out and try and contain her.  I need a way help her refocus and calm down, but I don't know what that is. 

I see just how intense her feelings are and she is really just along for the ride and it can be scary for her too. Does anyone have any advice for me?


Heather DeGeorge, CHC, FLTC said...

You know, when my big guy was 3 and 4, they were just the worst years of my life. I know how horrible that sounds, but it's true. And 4 was REALLY bad. Two things saved us:

1) changing the combinations of the healthy foods he was eating. Suddenly, bananas had to be eaten with peanut butter. Crackers had to be eaten with guacamole. Smoothies had to be made with an avocado in it. We had to ditch fruit juice. A lot of his behavior was exacerbated by his blood sugar balance. So if he had a sugar (even fresh fruit) or a starch (even a plain potato) it had to be accompanied with some good fats... nut butter, regular butter, avocado, etc. The change is noticeable in a day or two--it's quick.

2) I read a book that helped me change the entire dynamic of our home and making it as accessible as possible for him--enabling him to do as much for himself as he could. It drastically dropped the amount of pent up feelings of helplessness and that also lessened what needed to be released when he did blow up. The book was "At Home With Montessori" by Oriti.

All of this combined with my own practicing of focused meditation (like the free Chopra 21-day challenges) was a big help. His emotional roller coasters were less frequent and with far less height; and my ability to manage through them was significantly better because my brain was "trained" not to be reactive. So I didn't get worked up and I was able to be the calm in his storm.

Hope this helps you, mama. <3

Pam said...

I agree with the previous comment about diet changes making a big difference. Making sure there is a protein food along with starches and sugars really keep the blood sugar balanced. Also, avoiding artificial colors--that really helps! Hang in there!

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