I was a little confused the other night. Not too unusual- I mean there are 40 people running in different directions in my house on any given day- slight confusion is par for the course.
After dinner though, the husband said something kind of weird. H said he was considering not going to work tomorrow because I was acting strange... I thought he had a screw loose. I was fine. Tired but fine.
The kids went to bed I dozed off the morning came. I had to help get 2 middle kids off to grandma and grandpa's because I was still recovering from surgery and taking it a little easier was a better bet.
This is where things get really fuzzy for me- or like non existent.
I remember asking Princess where the middle girls were. I had no recollection of them going to grandma and grandpas.
Nothing made sense. There was a container of flour on the table and I had no idea how it go there. That was really upsetting to me.
I could not type the passwords on my computer. The passwords I type everyday. I could not get my hands to work.
Some how I called H.I don't know how. I was slurring words and I had no idea. I had no idea about a lot of things. It is terrifying to not know things that you should know.
Where did my husband work? Whats his name? What month is it. Whats this callled. Squeeze my hands. Smile.
I had a facial droop and a difference in strength. Not good.
I was so tired. So agonizingly tired.
When we got to the ER I learned my my mother in law had gone with me. I had never been so happy to see a face I recognized.
Then again. I don't remember much I had some tests with ear plugs and something with a plastic thing over my head I have no idea.
Little by little I got things put together again. The doctors talked to me and explained a TIA- transient ischemic attack and told me I would stay the night and see an neurologist as well as my hemotologist to best manage this. There was nothing I was doing that caused this. There are some things that we can (and will do) do prevent this again.
For something I do not remember it is terrifying. To know it could have ended worse; it is horrifying.
For the fact that it ended positively I am exceedingly thankful. I have so much to express thankfulness for I will never be able to list them all.. Seeing, knowing, hugging my family is at the top of the list. It could be gone in the blink of an eye.