Why did I not blog yesterday?

Why you ask? Maybe the pneumonia brewing in my lungs. Maybe the havoc that my children were kind enough to bless me with. One should be sufficient reason for my absence.

So everyone has been sick for a bit. The kids are on the mend- I am not. After a month of being sick from a kidney infection to a cold now some nasty thing that settled in my chest I gave in and called the doctor for the second time in a month to beg for help. She was wonderful. I have pneumonia. I am supposed to rest (obviously she missed the memo about the kids). I have antibiotics. Fantastic.

But that still does not answer the question why I did not write. Well my mistake was wondering for a split second what I was going to write about as my house had been pretty mellow for the past few weeks. Never.Again.

The kids dug deep and found all of the mischief that they had failed to make when they were not feeling so good and made up for lost time.

My FIVE year old- the one who has been potty trained for the past three and a half years went to the bathroom on the bathroom floor- not pee. After that got cleaned up I heard Stinky calling from the other bathroom. He waddled up to me with his pants around his ankles with toilet paper stuck between his bum cheeks- tears streaming down his cheeks. The paper was stuck. We got that taken care of I went to the bathroom and there was poop in the toilet (yay) on the toilet (not so yay) on the floor and on the toilet paper roll (decidedly not yay). That was fun. But that was just for warm ups.

Glass decorations that it took a bit of effort to get to were tossed on the floor and shattered sending slivers of glass all over. While I was cleaning that up Stinky was gearing up for the next round. He opened a box of wine (yes we are all sorts of KLASSY) that we had purchased for a family party and a good half of it went all over the dining room floor which had just been mopped. Four bath towels were needed to soak up the mess. FOUR regular sized bath towels. As that was getting wiped up Stinky slammed Princesses fingers in a door.

At the end of this I was SHAKING mad and shaking because I was sick. I called my girlfriend to vent and talk me out of locking myself in the bedroom. So that is why I did not blog the other day.