Peas Speech

Peas, while the definition of a spirited child, does not talk much. She says few words, but the ones she says she says very well.

However- we have been struggling with some frustration related tantrums. She has wants and needs and thoughts to communicate, and she can't. Then she rightly so- gets pissed. If I wanted to tell someone I needed xyz and I couldn't I would be frustrated too! It is also frustrating on this end. I want to help her. I want to meet all of her needs, but I cannot read minds.

So I set up an Early Intervention speech evaluation for her. That was today. She qualifies for speech therapy. But I have reservations which may not be founded.

Peas has NO comprehension issues, and no developmental issues- just this speech thing. She also has two older siblings who 'talk for her'. She has no real need to talk- they do it for her. The therapist mentioned that as she is so advanced in other areas and just delayed here- maybe getting her into a school setting away from her siblings, where she has to talk would allow her to flourish. I tend to agree. She could have the chance to blossom into her own little girl, make friends and learn to talk.

Well we'll see.

It takes a village

Or a major metropolitan area.

I joke when I say I am an "almost single mom", in truth I am a never single mom. Sure- there is not a husband waltzing in the door at 5 p.m. to provide back up, but that does not mean I am in this alone.

My friends are the best in the friend business and I have no idea how to repay them; I am just so so thankful for their help. Seriously, I could use ideas here.

Also my family has been phenomenal. From helping me get to a doctor appointment without losing my mind, to providing moral support so I do not burst into hysterics at "hello" my sister has been there for me.

My parents, well. Wow. I do not know what to say. They have done more than I could ever have imagined. Again, saying "thank-you" seems so so inadequate- but Thank you.

Thank you so so much.

August Giveaway

Well somethings happened and put me way way off schedule.


But I am so excited to bring this one to you.

The Dilly Daisy is sponsoring an awesome giveway.

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The prize is an adorable hand crafted hydrangea headband from the The Dilly Daisy! This fresh and delicate headband features a jumbo ivory hydrangea set with a sparking rhinestone. This beautiful bloom is securely attached to a stretch organza ruffle headband. The winner can customize the size: infant, toddler, or girl/adult and the color of the headband. The color choices are as follows: brown, hot pink, turquoise, lime green, red, black, pink, periwinkle, or cheetah print!

Here are some pictures:





Additionally, until Friday, August 27, all Making It Fun readers will receive 20% of their entire purchase. Simply comment "make it fun" upon checkout in the "comment" section. Your 20% will be refunded via paypal!

The Dilly Daisy is currently under construction so please feel free to contact them for a custom order or any questions.

The details:

As always leave, a comment here.
On Facebook "like" Making It Fun and The Dilly Daisy and tell me you did in a separate comment.
Post about this giveaway on your Facebook or Twitter, and tell me you did.
Last but not least, follow Making it Fun.

This giveway will run through 11:50 central time on August 27, 2010- when you leave a comment make sure that you have an email address associated with your blogger profile or you leave it for me.

I will contact the winner via email and the winner has 7 calender days to claim the prize.

Breastfeeding

Don't leave much to the imagination do I?

So yeah. I nurse. A lot, and pump, a lot. I am proud of it.

Today I met my sister to go to a new doctor for my kidney (I totally adore my sister,and feel a whole new level of things in common but that is neither here nor there).

She came down to get me and we went to her desk and she was pumping- at her desk. Fine whatever- when I was working I would pump on the way home, in my car, driving.

While it is her business where she pumps I was appalled that her office would not give her a private place to pump- as upon the new health care law passing employers in ALL states are required to- neither a bathroom stall nor a cube count as a private place according to federal law. If you want check out this site for the United States Breastfeeding Committee.


While making waves may not be her style; or anyone's style it makes me so mad, and as I am on a 'mad' streak right now- I'll just include her office in the ever growing list of things I am perturbed about.

I have nursed everywhere- if I go- my kids go- if a baby gets hungry I whip 'em out and feed the hungry person (or scared, or hurt, or child in need of comfort- heaven help me when I start offering milk to adults who are upset). Admittedly, I have not received much negative feedback about nursing my kids, I have gotten rude stares, too which, I stare back. But, the chiding or mean comments have not come my way which, I suppose is a good thing for everyone involved.

My sister recently blogged about breastfeeding and her tween son's reaction to it. I must say, I am proud of her for raising him in an environment where he sees breastfeeding as feeding a baby. Not as odd or gross- just food- for a baby.

Today for example- I nursed in the doctors office. With the doctor there, discussing my kidney issues. Both doctors were wonderful about it. They did not get my hungry child a second look other to comment on how adorable she is- and she is adorable.

its so quiet here

Well it stands to reason, I am down three kids. I have only one here, Pixie. The older ones went to my parents house for three days. I may lose my mind. Three days. Three endless days.

Sure they are loud. Very very loud, and I wish from time to time (everyday) for some peace and quiet. Now that I have it, I am restraining myself from hopping in the minivan and going to get them because, crap it is QUIET here. It is also dull. No princesses or dragons running through the living room. It totally makes me appreciate them in a huge new way- that that is a gift in itself. I am able to see more clearly how much my kids add to my life. How blessed I am to have them.

Pixie is at a loss too. There is not endless entertainment or someone to play with- and as a playmate- I kinda suck.

There have been times, not that in frequently that I am wishing for a vacation with no kids. I couldn't do it. Being honest with myself- I just couldn't do it. I would miss my them far too much. It is like part of my body is missing.

So I love them. I love them so very much

Neighborhood Spirit

To be honest I have no idea if block parties are a Midwestern phenomena but everywhere I have lived has had one. When I was a kid I looked forward to the block party from the beginning of summer. Block parties were super fun. Everyone brought food out, grown ups talked, kids played, and the best part- the street was blocked off so we could ride are bikes in the street.

As a kid I got to stay up later and play with the neighborhood kids and have a great time dancing and playing. We lived in an 'old fashioned' neighborhood though- neighbors were friends and we genuinely cared about each other.

I was thrilled when I learned that this neighborhood had the vibe of being 'old fashioned' when we were moving in our neighbor congregated on our driveway to welcome is and introduce themselves, the offered wheelbarrows, beer, whatever. When Billy got hurt they came to our rescue. I would be happy to help them out anyway I can. In general I consider them friends. We look out for one another.

So it was not really a surprise when we had a block party. The old school party- everyone brings a dish to pass, pulls out their grills, blasts music, and has a good time. So much fun.

We got a moon jump for the kids, a keg for the adults, had a bonfire, some neighbors brought out temporary tattoos for the kids, and games (with prizes) for the kids, older kids rode their bikes in the streets, and danced in disco lights when the sun went down. I sat out and chatted and learned I had a lot in common with some of our neighbors.

I am proud of of neighborhood. I am proud of our neighbors.

Summer fun photos

Ok- They do not look as happy as they were- really they were having a great time.

I need a pro photog to take some good pictures (*ahem* cough cough)

naughty naughty boy

I have heard of the terrible twos. I kind of expected hard times during the two year old time. True to the stereotype- it is like he looked at the calender and noticed they were two and decided to live it up.

See then when age three hit- I thought I was home free. Maybe there would be such a radical behavior change back to the nice child that I previously knew. Stinky just got more stubborn.

I thought "four- this has got to be it, sweet child will be back". Or not. In the past few months we have been dealing with the hardest behavior of all. I have been at my wits end several times- and called friends in utter desperation. Many glasses of wine have been consumed in an effort to remind myself that I am the grown-up. My job as a mama is to model and teach how to handle all sorts of situations, even frustration.

Here I will admit to losing my temper. I have not been as good as a model mama as I should be.

Today was a rough go- but I had a few realizations: Stinky needs to run around and get energy out. I was about ready to cry for most of the morning until I decided to go out side and 'wash the bad mood off of us' so we had a hose fight- and within half an hour my son had gone from a whiny unkind boy to the sweet loving boy I adore.

Then a light bulb when on in my head: we started having issues almost at the same time as my kidney issues started and I was in too much pain to run around with him and play actively like I normally do. So I am going to have to suck up pain and get out and be active in the interest of all of our sanity.

it is woefully obvious

Until recently I thought, erroneously so, that I was I strong person. In the past 8 weeks I have been dealing with daily pain and letting the pain win. 8 weeks of daily pain. 2 months. 2 very long months.

I have had so many x-rays, more narcotic pain medication than can be counted, 2 CAT scans, 2 ureteroscopies, 2 cytoscopies, 2 stents, 1 Nuclear Medicine Renal Scan, 1 MRI, more appointments, more blood work, so many messages, so many consults and NOTHING. NO Progress, no answers, no help.

So here I sit. Defeated. Discouraged. Ready to give up. Ready to run and hide, ready to just give in.

How much am I supposed to take? I have tried being patient and understanding. I just can't anymore. I am depressed and miserable. I want my life back. I want to be able to function. I want to be able to move with out pain (or even sit or lay down! without pain.) My kids need a mom who can play with them.

I want to have this fixed. Why is it taking so long??

Please excuse the following language- it is not nice.

I have had enough. Fucking-enough already.

This week alone we have had my kidney issues, Pixie in the hospital, a friend's baby dying, and countless other things have happened to people I know- so much loss so much sadness, so much so much- too much.

The passing of the baby has touched me in a way that I did not expect. It has touched me in a way I did not know could happen. I find myself thinking of them constantly. "My eyes leaking tears when I think I am done crying" to quote J, but still true. I look at my children as the blessings they are. I am reminded of their miraculous existence.

As a mother- I can empathize with the smallest smallest sliver of pain that she is experiencing. Obviously, my grief for them is nothing compared to what the parents are enduring, if I am this sad for them- the anguish that they are experiencing I can only imagine to be excruciating.

What to do. What to do for them to tell them that I am thinking of them; that their little perfect boy, has touched so many people. That so many are praying for them to ease their pain, to help them find comfort in the love and prayers of the thousands who are praying for them.

I do not know if this woman reads this blog. But if she does, I hope she understands that my thoughts and prayers are with her.

Please readers- pray for this family. Please, please pray for them.

A lot to say

I have a lot to say today...

But I want to start out with the feelings of thankfulness and gratitude that I am experiencing now.

Now. On to business.

My mother in law did something incredibly nice for me last weekend and I have not stopped thinking about it, she is helping me again this weekend and she offered to take a day off work to watch the kids on Friday when Pixie was in the hospital. Granted someone else ticked me off but- her offering to take a day to take care of my kids really touched me.

If you know the history here- pick your jaws up off of the ground now. We have not always gotten along- FAR from it- but over the years I have grown to see that her way of expressing caring is not the same as mine but- she loves my kids with every bit of her.

That is a gift. When my children are with her I know they are loved and cherished and spoiled rotten- like any grandparent should do.

So yah- over time- she has become more than B's mother. She has become part of my family.

(no I am not drunk. no, I have not taken any pain pills- just certain events lately have reminded me like a brick to the head how blessed I truly am)


I swear I am not drunk

Short

Sitting in the hospital and realizing how awful daytime TV is. I am also thinking about a topic on the Dr. Phil Show.

They are discussing about being short as a parents worst nightmare and about discrimination that go with short stature.

I was baffled by this. Short as a "worst nightmare"? really? if that is your worst nightmare then well be thankful. Be very very thankful. I make jokes about it..."I am TSA approved" or "Travel sized for convenience".

I am short. It can be annoying- but it is not a nightmare it just is. I was always the shortest in class and I was not teased anymore than anyone else, as I can recall (but my memory is admittedly sketchy at best).

My kids are very much gifts. Events have helped me see that. They are short too- I can think of about a hundred other nightmares that are way worse than being short.
The show discussed how a kid could not play sports because of his height. I don't buy it. If there is no other complicating factors, why not? I am athletic and short. Why do you have to be tall to play? The kid's mother was saying that about her child. That made me sad for the child more than anything. Mothers should not be ones to limit their children- especially over arbitrary things- telling them not to run in the road is one thing but I can't see telling my children that they are too short to play a sport. Mothers should nurture their children's authentic selves and help them grow and develop a strong sense of self and self worth- not undermine it by telling them they are too short.

Being short has not made me feel discriminated against- no more than being blond and blue eyed has made me feel discriminated against. I have people think I am younger than I am- I can deal with that. I get carded buying drinks- I can deal with that. In my mind that is not discrimination.

Good things come in short packages.

Reeling

I am still reeling from the loss yesterday.

How can a sweet baby die? How could that happen?

How can there be words of comfort for her family? How can I help bring healing and peace? How will that come for them? What can be done to help them? Words do not seem to be enough?

I am so grateful that I have my babies.

don't know what to say.

a) I am sorry for not writing much... busy does not seem to do it justice
b) I am tired
c) I am so incredibly angry and sad and mixed up and well a lot

I am writing this from the Pediatric floor of the local hospital. Pixie was admitted today with a very high fever and acting lethargic and just not herself. I am scared for her and worried about her.

I can't explain to her why they are hurting her all she does is look at me with her huge eyes with sadness and confusion

She had a really high fever the other day and Tylenol was not terribly effective and she was listless and unhappy. She needed to be on me constantly. Then there were the storms there were some fun storms that no one could sleep through. Two nights with no sleep. Lots of pain, bleeding, sick kid, water in the basement. Whole lot of not fun.

But here we are. Pixie is feeling better being loved on and snuggled. She is trying to pick her pulse ox off her toe and being stinkin' cute.

That is the the good news.

Then I found out about an absolute tragedy. A couple I know who had worked for and loved their new baby to the ends of the earth, lost their little one today. A few days after her due date. I am crushed for them. Broken for them. I cannot imagine their feelings.

It puts what I have been going through into perspective. It makes me thankful that I can sit her and make faces at my baby. It makes my kidney seem insignificant and nothing.

I am so so sorry for them for what they have to go through. If I could help them in anyway I would be happy to take a little of their load.

How are words supposed to convey anything close to what I am feeling for these people? How much more can be handed out? None of it is fair.

Winner!

for the massage: Nina!!