Research....

I was asked to write a about an event in American History. When I was offered the project, I did not know what, specifically.

After accepting the project, I learned the topic was the Columbine Massacre. This is really hard.

Age-wise I would have been classmates with Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold.

In Utah, some of the girls knew the boys... or at least knew of them.

All I can think about is how it happened in my perspective. Of all of the memories I have- this is one of the most clear. More clear than being told I was going home even.

This was a generational tragedy. The first tragedy that was widely covered by eyewitnesses on cell phones.

As a student- this shook me. As a pacifist this scared me. Now as a mother, this terrifies me.

I am glad that my kids are with me everyday. I am glad I am teaching them to honor and accept themselves.

More over I am sad. So so sad that this happened. So unable to address the enormity of what happened... what ever I say will not do justice to the reality.

As a person of faith I take comfort in knowing that G-d is looking after them. But that does not help the "why" or the loss or the tragedy.

How can I write about something that brings me back to being a kid- to watching it?