It really helps

Friday, April 9, 2010

Sometimes I feel bad about myself... don't we all though? I look in the mirror and I see lines, circles, bumps, and lumps that were not there- that should not be there-- that were not there- but now grace me with their presence.

I see wobbles and jiggles and all of the things that are not so appealing.

Since starting pole dancing I am less likely to immediately start the critique. I will instead appreciate the soft curve of my hips or the muscles that are becoming more defined in my legs.

The week before we officially graduated from level I, a classmate filmed us doing our dance, she filmed us individually; us dancing to our own music, doing our own thing. It was harder than I had anticipated. But it was a ton of fun.

She gave us each our DVDs and I was not expecting to look hot or sexy- I was expecting to look silly- like someone trying to look sexy and winding up looking goofy. I was so pleasantly surprised, shocked even, that I liked the way I look. I looked hot. I looked like I was having fun. I looked good! Sure, I can see that I have some jiggles that I would like to work on but for now..even if it never changes- I was hot!

It helps me remind myself that I am a woman an attractive woman at that and I can enjoy that.

3 comments:

Atwood-Family of FIVE said...

I am glad you got to see a good side of yourself in the video. It's happened to me before too and such a nice surprise. However, I don't like hearing how you find so much to criticize about yourself-especially since I know you personally and I know how incredibly skinny you are-granted I'm not seeing you naked and I'm not privey to those jiggly places-which all mama's have-but you really need to cut yourself some slack. I'm glad pole dancing is helping you focus on the postives of your life. I think you need that now.

Just Me said...

Ha! we are not dancing naked! Just in regular work out clothes, but things still wiggle and giggle there....

Atwood-Family of FIVE said...

Haha! I know that! I mean that I don't know what you look like when it's just you and your birthday suit and the mirror and we don't have anything to help tuck or hide or minimize those jiggly parts...I know some people would say they like my body but no one really gets to see the extra skin and stretch marks my belly now has that it didn't before.

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