Digesting

Last week in pole dancing it was not the best class for me. I was feeling tired and weak for some reason.

Even completing the work out was hard. Stretching was painful. My shoulder was sore for some unknown reason. I couldn't find my rhythm. I could not get tricks I have done a 100 times.

I was annoyed. I was frustrated. I felt like crying- or hitting something. Perfectionism set in, I did not want to try tricks because I was afraid I would not get them.

This was a first for me. I left Tease struggling. I did not confident or sexy. I felt fat and sluggish. Part of me even wanted to give up pole dancing. I started planning me meals (or lack of) for the next week to lose weight. While I know that is not an acceptable coping mechanism, it is where my head went.

Now that I am three days past the incident, I am nervous about my up coming class. But I will be there, ready to try it again.

I suppose there are bound to be off days, not everyday can be good.