Different Family Values

I have had some rough times in my life- many of them in fact.

As much as these times have sucked- my family has always helped me through them.  Yes, there were times of tough love- and a lot of times I was exceptionally angry with them- but when it has come down to it-- when I really desperately needed them they have helped.

When I had my first daughter and I had nothing for her- my mom came and helped, she taught me how to take care of my very very tiny baby.

She has come down at the drop of a hat when I have had a medical (kidney) emergency.  She has come down for kids grandparents days.  She is present in our lives. My sister and my aunts/ cousins are the same way.

So now B is hurt. His family has not really called to check on him frequently, not really offering help-- they have helped- but only when we have insisted.  Interestingly- it has not been B's immediate family offering to help- it has been his aunts and uncles.

His side of the family has always kind of confused me- they were even less helpful when I was sick, but I had assumed that it was because I was not their child and they felt that my family had the obligation.

I don't get it.

When my family or friends need help- or even if they need company- I'm there.  If I can give or do something I will- I know what it is like to feel alone, vulnerable, scared, and overwhelmed-- and it is pretty darn miserable.